Once There Was Me
by SisterOfStars
Summary: James had a summer fling, then he broke my heart. Then I got him back..for a short time. James/oc, James/Lily
1. Summer Romance 1

Part One Summer Romance

Disclaimer: Harry Potter isn't mine. I would be a lot richer if it was…

At Hogwarts, I was never the smartest, or the prettiest girl. I didn't have a lot of boy friends, or a lot of girl friends for that matter. But all of that changed one summer.

My parents had always been friends with the Potters. I had been to their house a number of times, but I never really talked to James. He was to- even as a young boy he was always loud, liked to be the center of attention.

I wasn't like that.

We barely spoke, even though my home was like his second home and his was mine. When we were at Hogwarts we didn't speak. It was like we didn't know each other. We were in the same house the same year, but it didn't change the fact that we didn't even speak. Actually, the only people who did speak to me were the three girls who shared a room with me. They were my best friends. Lily Evans, Andra Blake, and Laurie Mans.

But then, the summer after our fourth year, things changed. Kind of.

Like usual, my parents and James parents decided to "get the family together." We did this every summer. Either we would spend a week at their house, or they would come to ours. This year, we went to theirs.

I side apparated with mom as she arrived in front of the Potters…house. Very big house. My mom rang the doorbell, then waited.

The door was flown open only a moment later and Mrs. Potter hugged my mom like they hadn't seen each other in years. In reality, it was about two days.

"Hello Kassie." Mrs. Potter said, smiling down at me for a moment, then pulling me against her. I hugged her back softly. She pulled away and smiled at me again, before grabbing my mothers arm and pulling her into the house.

I looked at my father, who shrugged, and we followed them inside.

As soon as we walked in, my dad wandered back towards the back of the house, where Mr. Potter would most likely be found. My mom and Mrs. Potter wandered towards the kitchen, and I grabbed my bags and walked up the stairs.

I was here so often, I actually had my own room. It was on the second floor, two doors down from James room. The room in between the two was a guest room. I walked into "my" room and threw the bags on my bed. The room was exactly like I had left it the summer before, I think the only thing in here had been a house elf to dust.

I still had the picture of me and Lily on the dresser, and a mess of letters on the desk. When I opened the closet, I saw the dress I had worn to a dance a few years ago.

I opened my bags and slowly began to unpack. We were only supposed to be here for a week, but that usually doesn't happen. Most of the time, we stay here for half of the summer, then we go home and the Potters go with us. Then about a week before school starts, they go home. Then James and I see each other a week later.

I was humming a song to myself as I was unpacking. I was halfway done when I heard the door open. I turned around and saw James leaning against the wall. His dark hair was a mess, as usual, and his hazel eyes stared at me behind his glasses. He was handsome, I knew it and so did he. And so did every other girl in Hogwarts.

"Kassie." James greeted.

I nodded to him, wondering why he was here. We barely ever spoke during the summer. Which was actually more than we spoke at school.

"So, how did your school year go?" James asked, moving into my room and sitting in the desk chair.

I looked at him and raised my eyebrows. "Shouldn't you know? You were there."

James looked slightly uncomfortable and looked around my room. "Yeah well…we don't really…aren't really…"

"Friends?" I put in helpfully.

He glanced at me and frowned, then smirked slightly. "Yeah."

I let out a small smile, then sat down on the bed. "The school year was fine. How was yours?"

James smirked and his hand went up to run through his hair. "You don't know?" He said, his voice slightly mocking.

I laughed. "Of course. Who at Hogwarts doesn't know everything that's running through a Marauders head? Who you're dating, who you hate, who you like- its all public knowledge." I said, still grinning. "But that doesn't tell me how your school year went."

James looked at me for a moment, then laughed. "The school year was good." He laughed. "Had some…interesting times."

I laughed along with him, wondering where this was all coming from. "So," James said, after a moment. I just looked at him, one of my eyebrows raised. He sighed and looked around my room once again. "This is awkward." He said, finally.

I smiled and laughed slightly. "I agree with that." I muttered. We sat in silence a few minutes more, then James stood and nodded to me once. "Okay, well, good talk." James said, walking towards the door. "Talk to you at dinner."

I stared after him, looking at the door. Then I started laughing. What was that?

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We all sat at the dinner table, my mom and Mrs. Potter laughing over some story, my dad and Mr. Potter talking about something else, and me and James sitting at the end of the table, across from each other. Neither of us said anything, just sat in silence.

Then my mom decided to get involved.

"I don't know what to do about Kassie most of the time." My mom said to Mrs. Potter, thinking I couldn't hear her. "She doesn't talk to anyone. I mean, look at her and James! They're just sitting there. James isn't shy in the slightest, but he isn't even trying to talk to her. I just don't know what to do most of the time. The only people she talks to are those girls, and that Andra isn't the type of girl mothers like their daughters to hang out with."

My jaw tightened. I knew mother didn't like Andra, but did she really have to announce it? I shot a quick glance at James and saw him looking from my mother, to me, and back again, his brow furrowed.

I looked back at my mother as she started talking once again, completely oblivious to the fact I was listening to her every word.

"And she wont talk to me." My mother said. "She hasn't told me anything about school. I have no idea about her love life," she whispered, " she wont talk to me. I just worry about her. She's in her forth year. This was the year I started dating Richard," she looked at her husband, " but it doesn't look like anything like that is going to happen to her. Not for a long time."

I had had enough.

I stood quickly. "Excuse me." I muttered. My mom and dad looked at me, a little shocked, but I ignored it and made my way out of the dining room.

Instead of going upstairs, I went outside and sat on the grass, looking at the stars. Why couldn't my mom understand that I wasn't her? I didn't want to be her. I wanted to live my life. So what if I wasn't going to get married right after high school? Why would I want to?

"You okay?" A voice asked softly, a body sat down next to me.

I nodded. "Fine."

James smirked. "Sure you are." We sat in silence for a moment, then James sighed. "Kassie, your mom is right."

I looked at him, outraged, but James continued anyway. "You don't have a lot of friends. You don't talk to anyone. But she's wrong about one thing." He looked up and our eyes met. "You're that way because you want to be. If you want someone to be around you, they will be." We looked at each other for a moment, then I shivered. He moved closer to me and put his arm around my shoulders. We just sat in silence, staring up at the stars.


	2. Summer Romance 2

Part Two Summer Romance Part 2

Disclaimer: Harry Potter isn't mine. Just the characters you don't recognize.

James and I grew a lot closer over the next few days. And soon, I actually considered him one of my good friends.

"Kassie!" A voice yelled as someone banged on my door.

I groaned, then rolled over in bed. "Go away!" I yelled sleepily.

"Wake up!" James voice came floating back to me. "We have company."

I groaned again. Company. I knew what that meant. I had been here before and come downstairs to see all of the Marauders. But now, apparently since I was friends with James, I was going to be friends with them.

"Too early." I muttered. I rolled over and was almost back asleep when I heard James muttering to someone. Then I heard my door open.

"Kassie." James said in a sing song voice.

I groaned. "Go away." I muttered again.

James laughed and I felt my bed sink lower as someone sat on it. "No." I said, yawning.

The bed sank lower and I opened my eyes and screamed when I saw James eyes only inches from mine. He laughed and grabbed my hand, pulling me up in a sitting condition. I yawned again and James smiled. He leaned forward and ruffled my hair. He leaned away quickly and cleared his throat. "Sirius and Remus are here. Pete's on vacation. We'll be outside."

He left quickly, shutting the door behind him softly. I got out of bed and pulled on some clothes, then pulled my dark brown hair into a pony tail, then I made my way downstairs. I walked outside and saw Remus Lupin standing closest to me. Remus was the smallest in the group of boys present, but he wasn't as slight as he looked. He was actually muscular, with sandy brown hair and blue eyes. He was also the nicest of the boys, and the smartest.

Sirius Black was leaning against the wall, talking to James. His black hair hung in his grey eyes, and his white teeth flashed against his tan skin. He was the play boy of Hogwarts, dating a different girl every week. And he was the funniest of the Marauders.

James looked up and saw me, then smiled brightly and walked over to me quickly. "Kassie! Sirius, Remus, this is Kassie."

Both boys nodded, Sirius rolled his eyes. "We know that, James." He muttered.

James glared at his friend, then looked over at me. "We were going to go flying. Want to go?"

I bit my lip, but nodded. "Sure. That sounds good."

James smiled at me and my heart moved in my chest. I ignored it. This was James Potter. Nothing was going to happen with us.

We all got on our brooms, James and Sirius racing around, doing tricks and such. Remus and I flew next to each other. "So," Remus said, having to raise his voice slightly because of the wind. "You and James getting along then?"

I nodded. "Things are going well. He's…different then I thought he was."

Remus cracked a smile. "Yeah, I bet he is." He shook his head slowly. "James doesn't really let people close. I mean, all he lets them see is the Marauder. Nobody really sees James. Unless he wants them too."

I frowned, remembering James saying the same thing to me only a few days ago. Could James Potter really be more like me than I he appears to be?

"So, what classes are you taking next year?" Remus questioned.

I told him and he and I got into a discussion about our OWLS. They were coming up soon. We were in the middle of discussing ancient ruins when James and Sirius flew over to us. "What are you two talking about?" James asked, sounding slightly annoyed.

Remus raised his eyebrows as his friend. "We were talking about school."

"Oh." James said, instantly losing interest. "Kassie, lets race."

"No thanks." I said. Race the Quidditch captain? No thanks.

"Come on." He whined. "It'll be fun."

"No." I said, though there was less force behind it this time.

"Yes!" James said, knowing he had won me over.

I laughed and took off. I head James yell something about not being fair, but only a second later, he was right behind me. I was still in front of him, and I saw him glance at my broom from the corner of my eye. I knew what he was going to do before he did it. "James, don't you dare." I yelled over my shoulder.

He sent me a wicked grin and jumped from his broom onto mine. "James!" I yelled, almost losing control. He laughed, then reached around and steadied the broom. He brought it down slowly, and as soon as we touched the ground, I turned on him. "What the hell did you think you were doing?" I yelled, slapping him in the chest. He was just laughing, trying to catch my hands.

"Kassie!" He said, still laughing. "Come on!"

"We could have died!" I said, though now I was trying to fight back a laugh.

Finally tired of being hit, James grabbed my hands and tackled me to the ground. "No fair!" I whined. He was laughing as he pinned my arms over my head, his body on top of mine.

I stopped laughing, suddenly aware of how close he was to me. I could literally feel his heart pounding. He stopped laughing only a second later, his face suddenly serious as he gazed down at me. Our eyes met. My heart was pounding so loud, I really thought he could hear it. His eyes slid from mine so they rested on my lips. He leaned his head lower, lower-

"Oi!" Sirius said, landing beside us. "I think you won, Prongs."

James rolled over, his heat leaving my body. I wanted to scream. He stood and then held out his hand, still completely serious. I reached up and grabbed his hand and he pulled me to my feet. "Lets go get something to eat." Sirius said, ignoring us.

Remus shot us an amused glance, then followed Sirius towards the house. James and I didn't speak, just followed them towards the house.

But he didn't drop my hand, just entwined his fingers with mine.


	3. Summer Romance 3

Part Three Summer Romance Part 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

"So, how did your day go, Kassie?" My mother asked at dinner that night. She was smiling at me brightly. "I saw you talking to the boys!"

I glanced over at James, who was looking at me from the corner of his eye. He gave me a small smile, then looked back at his food. "It was fine, mother."

"What boys?" My dad said, breaking away from his conversation with Mr. Potter. My mother just laughed. "No, what boys."

"Just James and his friends." My mother assured him.

That didn't ease my dad. At all. "James friends? That Black kid?" He turned to me. "You cannot date that Black kid."

"Dad." I said, slightly embarrassed. James was smirking from across the table.

"No." Dad said stubbornly. "You cant date him. I've heard of him." He looked thoughtful for a moment. "Though, that Remus kid. He might be okay."

Now it was my turn to smirk as James scowled. "Okay, daddy. If you want me to date Remus-"

I stopped as James glared at me from across the table. My mother and Mrs. Potter caught the look. "Oh." My mother said, slightly giddy.

"What?" My dad said.

"Nothing, dear. Nothing." My mom said, patting my dad on the shoulder.

Mrs. Potter and my mom kept giggling and glancing at us through the entire dinner. I rolled my eyes at James and he smirked and looked at his mother. "Can I be excused?"

She nodded and looked at me expectantly. "You're excused too, Kassie." Mom smirked at me.

I rolled my eyes yet again and followed James out the door. I just turned the corner to head up the stairs when he grabbed my hand and squeezed it softly. He held a finger to his lips. I looked at him questioningly for a moment, but he pulled me towards his room.

We stepped inside and he closed the door softly, then pulled me down next to him on the bed. He still held my hand, but leaned back and made himself comfortable, leaning his head on the headboard. "We haven't really talked." James said softly. "Maybe we should do that."

I laughed slightly and he smirked. "Favorite color?"

"Blue."

"Mines red." He said. "Favorite season?"

"Spring."

"Summer. I'm out of questions."

I laughed. "We have to know something about teach other. We've known each other our entire lives."

James smirked, then opened his eyes slightly. "I know a lot about you, truthfully. But I don't know you."

I bit my lip. "You know me. That's all there is."

James shook his head. "I doubt it." he looked at me and sat up. I stared back at him.

He leaned forward slightly, still staring into my eyes. I swallowed hard. He was going to kiss me. I know it. He lifted his hand and put it against my cheek, then leaned closer. I leaned in. He looked down at my lips, then closed the gap.

I was kissing James Potter.

He kissed me slowly. I kissed him back, obviously. He pulled away, his hand still on my cheek. I smiled at him and he smiled back. He laid back on the bed and pulled me so I was nestled in his side. I put my head down against his muscular chest. He smiled slightly and started stroking my hair.

"Remus." He muttered.

I burst into laughter. "Oh, think that's funny, do you?" James said playfully, nudging me.

"Yes." I giggled. Then I mimicked him, pitching my voice lower. "Remus."

He smirked, then frowned slightly. "I wonder what your dad would say about me. He doesn't like Sirius. Why would he like the idea of us dating?"

"He knows you." I answered. I shrugged. "He doesn't like Sirius."

"Yeah, I caught that." James said, smiling slightly. He shrugged. "I guess we'll find out." he leaned down and kissed the top of my head.

"Yeah," I said sighing. "we will."


	4. Summer Romance 4

Part four Summer Romance 4

Disclaimer: Harry Potter isn't mine.

The summer was going great. I was with James constantly, we were never separated. And I loved it. I didn't want to be away from him.

And his friends weren't as bad as I thought they were. Soon, they became my friends too. Sirius was actually a really good guy to have around as soon as he ended the whole flirting thing. And Remus became a good friend. He was a great guy, someone to talk to. Though I did talk to him so much that it kind of annoyed James.

"The summer is almost over." James said, two weeks before school started. We were now at my house, lying on my bed.

"Then we go back to school." I scrunched up my nose. He laughed and flicked my nose with his finger.

"School isn't that bad." James laughed, a wistful look in his eye.

I let out a harsh laugh. "Maybe for you."

James gave me a small smile. "Maybe it'll be better this year." He smirked. I rolled my eyes.

"Why, because you'll be there?"

James smirked. "Exactly." I laughed again and he leaned down to kiss me.

The kiss became more passionate, like they had lately. And, unlike usual- neither of us backed away.

We followed through till the end.

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The next morning, neither of us could stop smiling. My mother watched me with raised eyebrows, and I tried to keep a straight face.

As soon as she turned her back a smile broke out.

Sirius and Remus came over that afternoon. Both boys were watching us with a knowing expression on their faces. I tried to ignore them.

James had his arm around my shoulder and was kissing my neck as I giggled. "James, mate, lets go get something to eat. I'm hungry." Sirius whined. James growled and looked up.

"I'm a little busy here." He growled.

"I see that." Sirius rolled his eyes. "But I'm hungry. Lets go. Moony can watch Kass for a minute."

James growled again, but took his arm off of my shoulders. "Fine." He turned around. "Be right back." he kissed me quickly, then he and Sirius took off.

"So," Remus said, a slight smirk on his lips. "Good night?"

"Shut up Remus."

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"Come on Kassie." James said, pulling me down the stairs. "We're supposed to meet them in ten minutes."

I laughed. "Calm down, James. We'll be on time."

We flooed to Diagon Ally, then hurried down the street to the bookstore. The others were already there.

"hey." Sirius greeted.

"Pete!" James said happily. "How was the summer?"

"Good." Peter said, looking at me curiously. "Who are you?"

I blushed slightly and Remus shook his head as Sirius smacked Peter in the back of the head. James just glared. "Kassie Tyler." Remus told him. "The girl James has been talking about all summer."

Now James blushed.

"Lets get our things." Sirius said, obviously bored with the conversation.

We made our way through Diagon Ally. I held James hand, and everyone we passed from Hogwarts noticed.

"Who is that?"

"Why would Potter go for-"

"Isn't that that girl that hangs out with Evans?"

"James Potter-"

"What's her name?"

James squeezed my hand. I looked up to smile at him to show him it didn't matter to me, but he wasn't looking at me. He had this expression on his face, like he was deep in thought. Like something was going on in that head that none of us could get to…

"Are you okay?" I asked him softly.

He shook his head and looked down at me, then smiled a fake smile. "Lets go home." I nodded, still worried, and followed him down Diagon Ally.

If I had looked back, I would have seen the worried looks Sirius and Remus exchanged.


	5. Chapter 5

Part Five School

Disclaimer: Harry Potter doesn't belong to me, though I wish it does.

A/N: Don't get mad at me for this chapter! It gets better!!

James acted strange the rest of the week. Then his family was going home, and I would see him on the train September first. "I'll see you in a week." He told me softly.

I nodded and he smiled slightly before leaning down and kissing me. We pulled apart and instead of smiling, he looked down at me with a strange expression on his face. I looked up at him and he just leaned down and kissed me again, this time really hard.

"James!" His mother yelled.

He pulled away, then kissed me quickly one more time and ran down the stairs.

That was the last time James and I were okay.

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On September first, I arrived at the Platform and waited till someone arrived. The first person to arrive was actually Lily Evans.

"Kassie!" She yelled. She ran over to me and hugged me closely. I laughed. "So, you and Potter, huh?" She said in a disapproving voice. I sighed.

"Lily-"

She held up her hand. "I'm not going to lecture you. If you want to date Potter, that's fine."

I laughed, like it was her decision. She pushed her dark red hair over her shoulder, then smiled at me. "I got prefect."

I smiled at her brightly, "Congatulations!"

"Not that its any surprise." A voice said. I looked around and saw Andra and Laurie standing behind us. I hugged both of them.

Andra was tall, blonde, and beautiful with dark blue eyes. She loved guys- and they loved her. That was what my mother was talking about when she said she didn't like Andra.

Laurie was completely different. She was shorter than the rest of us, with really dark hair and dark brown eyes. She was also the smartest in our group.

"Kassie!" A voice called. I looked over and saw the Marauders heading towards us.

Sirius came up and ruffled my hair and Remus smiled at me brightly. I looked towards James, but he wasn't looking at me.

He was looking at Lily.

He had this slightly dazed expression on his face, like he couldn't look away. I looked at Lily. She was to busy talking to Remus to notice.

But everyone else noticed.

Sirius looked at his best friend, then to me, a frown on his face. Andra was glaring at James like she was going to slap him at any moment, while Laurie looked at me, eyebrows raised.

Sirius finally cleared his throat and hit James in the side. James snapped out of it and looked at me, a slightly guilty expression on his face. "Hey, Kassie." He sounded nervous. Unsure.

"Hi." I said, slightly confused to why he hadn't kissed me. Or even hugged me.

We stood in awkward silence for a moment, then Lily looked over at us, noticing the looks for the first time. "Remus and I have a meeting to go to." She announced, giving us all a confused glance.

"Bye." I muttered.

She shot me a quick look, but she and Remus walked away. "Lets go find a compartment, Kass." Andra said softly, glaring at James. She grabbed my arm and was pulling onto the train when James spoke.

"Kassie? Can I talk to you?"

I looked over just in time to see Sirius give his friend an incrediuos look. He muttered something about a compartment, then walk onto the train.

That's when I knew what was going on.

"You're breaking up with me?" I said, my voice shocked.

James hung his head. "I just- right now- its not the right time."

"The right time?" I yelled. "Why? Because we're back at school and I'm no longer the only one around?"

"Shh." James hissed, looking at all of the people watching us.

"Why James?" I demanded.

He didn't answer me. He just made his way to the train and climbed on.

I felt like the dumbest person on the planet. I silently made my way down the hall, the tears running down my face. I walked by the Marauders compartment. Remus was still at the prefect meeting. Peter was trying to find something in his trunk. James was sitting at the window, staring out into nothing. And Sirius was watching me. He looked at me, then at James, and stood and slowly made his way towards me. Nobody noticed he left.

He pulled me down the corridor to the compartment my friends were sitting in, then pulled me to his chest as I cried.


	6. Chapter 6

Part six

Disclaimer: Not mine

Fifth year. It wasn't long ago that James had told me my fifth year was going to be better. Better because he was going to be with me.

What a load of shit.

Better? Try worse. A lot worse.

I was no longer the girl who nobody knew. I was James Potter's summer fling. The girl he slept with and ditched. That was it.

James watched all of the teasing, the insulting. And he didn't do anything about it. He just sat back and watched it happen. Oh, and he tried to date Lily.

Everyday, he tried asking her out. He must have known how I felt, because he never asked her in font of me, but I heard. People loved to tell me.

Like I said, James didn't do anything. But his friends did.

I was walking down the hall one day when a Slytherin walked by and grabbed my shoulder. "Heard you gave Potter a little bit of fun. Maybe you can try it with me." He said, trying to run his hand down my body.

He was ripped off of me a second later. I fell back into a wall and looked up to see Sirius's fist collide with the guys jaw.

SIRIUS POINT OF VIEW

Kassie looked horrible. He dark brown hair was almost always messy and slightly greasy. Her ice blue eyes were always tired, blood shot. I almost wanted to kill James for what he did to that girl.

I really didn't even know what happened. James was crazy about her. I couldn't get him to shut up. Then we went to Diagon Ally. James always did care about his image a little to much, and when he heard all the whispers, I think it got to him. I knew something was going to go wrong the second I saw his face that day.

Then there was that day at the train station. James had always had a thing for Lily, but when he started dating Kassie, I thought he was finally over it.

I guess not.

He looked at Lily like he couldn't get enough of her. And Kassie was right there!

But now, the only thing James cares about is getting Lily to go out with him. He pretends not to notice what's happening to Kassie, but I see him wince whenever someone calls her a name, flinch whenever anyone talks about her.

But he wont do anything about it.

I was walking down the hall one day, with Remus, when I saw some Slytherin practically mauling Kassie. I didn't even think. I pulled the asshole off of her and hit him in the face. He tried to get away, but I wouldn't have it. I just kept hitting him.

Then I found myself hanging in the air. "Mr. Black!" Professor Slughorn snapped. "Detention!"

!#&((&#&()(&#&())(&#

KASSIE

I looked at Sirius. "Thank you." I mouthed. He nodded as Slughorn let him fall back onto the ground.

"Are you Black's new slut?" A voice hissed. I turned and saw yet another Slytherin looking at me. This one a girl. "Just planning on going through all of the Marauders? Who will you move to next?"

I couldn't think of anything to say, just made my way down the hall pretending not to hear the laughter.

"Come here." Andra said. I looked up, surprised to see her. I leaned against her and she hugged me close. "Please forget him." She whispered softly. "Just- find someone else. Someone who will treat you like you deserve."

I followed her eyes and saw them on Sirius as he was led to Slughorns room. "Sirius?"

"He's the only one who is trying to make up for what James has done!" Andra said. "I think you should go for it! Try to date Sirius?"

"Date Sirius?" A voice questioned. A voice we both knew.

We turned to see Remus looking surprised, and a very green James standing behind us. Andra glared at him. "Yes. I think it would be a good match."

"For her to date a guy that would only want her for sex?" James practically yelled. People stopped, watching us. "That would be a good match?"

"Why not?" Andra snapped back. "That's all you used her for!"

There was silence. James looked stunned while Remus was once again looking at the floor. Andra looked at me, eyes wide. "Kassie-"

I didn't wait around to hear her apology. I just shook my head and walked away.


	7. Chapter 7

Part Seven

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

Andra kept up the idea of me dating with Sirius for weeks. Every time she would give me that look, I would see James shoot Sirius a glare. Sirius just pretended he didn't know what was going on. But I knew he did.

Remus came up to me in November. "This idea Andra has, the idea for you to date Sirius-"

"Is dumb." I cut in.

"-is really getting annoying." Remus said, laughing slightly. "She just keeps going on about it and its really getting to the guys."

I laughed, a really bitter sound. "What would they care."

Remus looked at me for a moment, then motioned for me to follow him. He led me up the boys staircase, then into the boys dorm. I paused at the door, but nobody was there.

I passed three beds and met Remus at what had to be his, it was the cleanest in the room. I sat down and he sat right across from me. "Kassie, you have to know that what James did- none of us expected it. And none of us approve of it."

I nodded. Right. Nobody expected it. Except James. He knew what he was going to do. He had to know.

"James still cares for you. He wont admit it, but he does. And he doesn't like how Sirius has been standing up for you these last few months."

"He sure as hell isn't doing it." I muttered.

Remus shot me a look that made me regret my words instantly. "It isn't easy for him either. But Andra with this Sirius thing…Sirius hears it, but he acts like he doesn't. And every time she says it, James gets even more pissed off."

"That isn't my problem." I said, standing up. I really didn't want to hear this.

"I think you need to hear this." Remus said, grabbing my arm.

"I don't think I do." I protested. "I really did care for him, Remus. And he just broke up with me. And he likes my best fiend. What am I supposed to say to that?"

Remus shook his head. "I'm not going to argue and say James did the right thing. I cant help the fact that James likes Lily, and I cant change what he did to you. But you have to understand that he had other reasons for doing what he did."

"I know why he did it." I snapped. "Its because of who I am. A nobody. James Potter cant be seen with a nobody. Someone who isn't as popular as he is, or as good looking. Someone who- isn't like Lily." I finished quietly.

I felt the tears fall from my eyes and I hastily wiped them on my sleeve. Remus sighed and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me against his chest. I let the tears fall for awhile, then I just stayed there. I felt safe. Away from everything.

"Sirius feels bad about everything James did. And so do I." Remus said, still holding me. "And I think James feels bad also. But we all have to find a way to let it go. This all has to end."

I nodded, still staying where I was.

Then the door opened.

"Our first match is in a week. We have to wi-"

I looked up and saw both James and Sirius staring at us. Remus instantly dropped his arms. I stood. "I, uh, going now." I made my way towards the door.

Sirius stepped aside to let me pass, though he was staring at me with wide eyes. James didn't move. "What the hell are you doing?" He questioned, his voice full of anger. His fist was balled.

"Talking." I said shortly.

"Didn't look like there was much talking." James sneered.

"Leave her alone, James." Remus said tiredly.

James turned to him, eyes narrowing. "Moony-"

"Let Kassie go." Sirius said softly. He grabbed my arm and began to pull me towards the door, but James stepped in front of him.

"I want to know what's going on." James growled.

"Then maybe you should actually pay attention instead of looking at Lily all day." I snapped.

James jaw dropped. I used that moment to push past him and walk out the door.

!#&()(&!#&()(&#!#&()(&!#&()(&#&(

"Kassie!" Andra said, jumping onto my bed the next morning. "Its Hogsmeade today!"

"Yay." I muttered, closing my eyes once again.

"Nope." Lily said, grabbing my arm. "Time to get up! Girls day!"

"We always have girls days." I pointed out, eyes still closed.

"That really isn't the point." Laurie said softly. "Get up."

"NO." I growled, pulling my blanket over my head. I didn't hear anything and figured they had finally gone away.

Wrong.

Ice cold water soaked my bed. I sat up, screaming. "Andra!" She took one look at me and ran out the door. I ran after her. I grabbed her as we hit the top of the stairs. We fell the rest of the way.

We hit the bottom and I continued to hit her. "Water?"

"Oh god. Please tell me you didn't pour water on her to wake her up." A voice said.

James.

I stood quickly, Andra following a moment later. The Marauders, along with half of the house, were staring at us with wide eyes.

And I just realized I was only wearing boy shorts and a t-shirt. "Nice outfit, Kassie!" One seventh year yelled. "Looking good! Of course, its nothing Potter hasn't seen, right?"

Andra and Sirius both grabbed their wands, but someone else beat them to it. The boy sprouted boils all over his body and he howled in pain. James wand was still pointed at him. "Don't say it again. Any of you." He said angrily.

I didn't wait around to find out if anyone did.


	8. Chapter 8

Part Eight

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter- which all of you knew already.

A/N: THANK YOU to all who reviewed and put me on their alert and favorites lists!

Something changed after that, though it hard to tell what exactly that was. People no longer spoke to me, it was like the year before, like I wasn't there. But the Marauders knew I was there. When I walked into the room, walked by them, there was a different reaction from each of them. James tensed up, refused to meet my gaze, just looked at anything, or anyone else. Sirius smirked at me, always amused. Remus gave me a sad smile, then went back to whatever he was doing. Peter just stared at me.

Andra, Laurie, and Lily stayed with me, never leaving my side. I loved the girls, really, I did, but they were really starting to get on my nerves.

And it didn't help anything that I could still here everyone whispering that James asked Lily out yet again. It was like he wouldn't take no for an answer, he just kept pushing it. Lily made sure not to talk to Laurie or Andra about it when I was around, but I still heard.

I just threw myself into my studies. They couldn't be mad at me for studying, even though Andra was a bit annoyed.

It was on one of my studying nights when I noticed something a little…odd. I was sitting in the corner, reading my potions book, when I saw Laurie come down the girls stairs quietly and sit on the couch in front of the fireplace. She didn't say anything, just sat there, like she was waiting.

A minute later, Remus walked down the stairs. I saw his face light up when he saw Laurie sitting there. He walked over and gave her a soft smile before sitting beside her. That's all they did, they just sat there. Then, slowly, Remus reached over and grabbed Laurie's hand. She blushed brightly, but smiled at him.

I swallowed hard, and felt sudden tears come to my eyes. I wasn't upset because they were together, I was upset that she hadn't told us. Hadn't told me. I knew what she was thinking, she didn't want me to know her life was coming together at the time mine was falling apart. And she was right, I couldn't take it. I grabbed my books and stood, taking care not to make any noise what-so-ever. Then I walked up the girls staircase and into my room, falling into an uneasy sleep.

!#RT&()&#!#&()(&#!#&())(&#!

The days passed quickly, with nothing changing, then finally it came time for Christmas Break. You would think this would be a relief, a chance to get away from everyone.

Not for me it wasn't.

I was actually dreading it. And you've probably guessed why by now. My mother and Mrs. Potter always insisted on spending the holidays together. This year, they were coming to our house.

I was sitting with my friends on the train. I twisted my hands, bit my lip, and stared out the window. "We'll be there for the new years party." Andra assured me, throwing her hand around my shoulder.

I smiled at her slightly, then froze as the train finally came to a halt. We stood and walked out of the train and onto the platform. I saw my parents in an instant, standing next to the Potters.

I took a deep breath and walked towards them. My mother smiled at me brightly. "Kassie!" She cried happily, pulling me against her.

"Hi, mum." I said quietly. I pulled away from her and turned to the Potters. "Mr. Potter, Mrs. Potter." Mrs. Potter beamed at me and pulled me against her. I hugged her back stiffly.

"Mum." A deep voice said.

Mrs. Potter let me go and threw herself at her son instead. I turned around and looked at my friends. "See you on new years." Lily said, hugging me quickly. "If it gets to bad, you can come stay with us." Lily whispered. I hugged her back tightly.

"Bye Lils." She hugged me, then wandered over to her own parents.

"Love you, Kass." Andra said, smirking and hugging me. My mom frowned. Andra winked at me then turned to my mother. "Hey, how's it going?"

My mother frowned at her and I fought back a laugh. Sirius didn't show the same courtesy. He laughed loudly and came over to throw his arm around Andra. "See you at New Years." He smirked at her.

Andra rolled her eyes and shook Black off. "Bye, Kass."

Laurie was next. She had been distant since she started dating Remus, but she had yet to tell any of us that they were dating. She smiled at me softly. "Owl me." She said, leaning down to hug me.

I nodded and she smiled at me, then wandered away. "Okay, if that's over, lets go home!" my mother gushed. Then she laughed. "I mean, your home."

I frowned. "We aren't going home first?"

"No, we already brought your clothes and things to the Potters." My mother said, beaming.

"But-" I could feel my eyes widen and my jaw drop open.

"You'll get to spend more time with James and Sirius that way!" My mom said brightly. "Sirius is staying the holiday."

"More time with James and Sirius." I muttered. "Great."

Sirius laughed and pulled me against him. "Come on, love. You know you want to spend all of the time in the world with us."

"Enough Sirius." James snapped, glaring at his friend.

Sirius shook his head, but didn't remove his arm from around my waist. "Come on James. It's just a little bit of fun."

"Some fun." James muttered, still glaring.

Sirius ignored his friend and continued pulling me along with my parents and the Potters. "Okay, lets go." Mrs. Potter said. She grabbed James, and my mother grabbed me. Mr. Potter grabbed onto Sirius, and we apparated back to the Potters.

As soon as we got there, I broke away from my mom and made my way up the stairs. I heard Sirius mutter something to James, and a second later he was right behind me. "What do you want?" I asked.

Sirius shrugged. "I've been here almost as much as I've been at home over the holidays." he said, smirking again. "And yet, I've never seen your room."

I raised my eyebrows. "And why not?"

Sirius shrugged. "James wouldn't let me. Always said something about it being yours and deserving privacy or something. I don't know. I just know he'd get pissed if I tried to go in there."

I scoffed and pushed the door open to my room. It was exactly as I had left it- including the picture frames James and I had hung on the wall last summer. There was a picture of us laughed and hugging outside, a picture my mother had taken one night when James and I had fell asleep on the couch, and a picture of me and James hugging and kissing while Sirius rolled his eyes and Remus smiled at the camera.

Sirius raised his eyebrows and I walked around and pulled the frames down. Then I tossed them to Sirius, who caught them and looked at me with a 'what the hell do I do with these?' look on his face. "Get rid of them. I don't care what you do. Burn them, throw them away. Whatever."

Sirius frowned, but nodded. Then he looked around my room again. "Well, this isn't very interesting." He muttered.

I giggled and he laughed again, then sat down on my bed. Then he became serious. "Look, I know this is going to be awkward for you, but at least it isn't just you and James, right?"

I sighed deeply. "I'm glad you're here, Sirius."

He smiled brightly. "Finally, some recognition!"

I laughed and he stood. "I better go find James." He walked out the door, still carrying the pictures.

#&())(&#&())(&#

SIRIUS POINT OF VIEW

I walked out of Kassie's room and walked two doors down to James room. I pushed the door open and saw him lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling.

I threw the pictures on the bed next to him. "Kassie told me to get rid of them. Burn them were her exact words." I said. James glanced down at the photos, then quickly looked back at the ceiling.

I glared at him. "I wanted to give you the option. Do you want me to burn them?"

James didn't reply. I shook my head in disgust. The guy was my best friend, my brother, but that didn't mean I agreed with him. "Fine." I snapped, reaching towards the photos.

My hand caught air. The pictures were scooped up before I reached them. Damn James and those Quidditch skills!

"I'll take care of them." James said quietly. He wasn't looking at the ceiling any longer, he was to busy looking at the photos. I moved towards the door, leaving James alone with his thoughts.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Sorry it took me so long! I know you don't want to read this, but I actually had this part done! Its just been sitting on my computer because I forgot about it! Sorry! Please review anyway!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the harry potter characters.

The Christmas break passed slowly, though it seemed to have fallen into a sort of routine. I mostly stayed in my room, but when I had to come out, for meals and such, Sirius talked. That way, our parents didn't notice that James and I weren't speaking- actually, we weren't doing anything. I don't think I had looked right at him since the first day we were here.

And I really didn't want to.

It was Christmas Eve, and I had got up early to meet my friends in Diagon Ally. I still hadn't done any of my Christmas shopping. I made my way downstairs, and then over to the table quickly, surprised to see everyone awake and eating.

"You're up early." My mother said, sounding surprised.

"Why are all of you up?" I asked, sitting down and grabbing some pancakes.

Everyone chuckled slightly, even James. "We eat breakfast together every morning." Sirius told me, reaching over and tugging the end of my hair. "Not everyone sleeps till noon, Kass."

My mother sighed. "I had hoped she would grow out of that one day. Not really a great quality-"

"So, why did you decide to grace us with your presence this morning?" Sirius asked, cutting my mom off. It was obvious he didn't like the way my mother talked to, and about, me. She glared at him from across the table.

"I'm going shopping." I told him softly, not looking at my mother.

"Did you not do your Christmas shopping again? Merlin, Kassie! Cant you-"

"That sounds like fun." James said, now interrupting my mother. He didn't look up from his breakfast.

"We'll join you." Sirius said, nodding his head like it was decided.

No! They couldn't join me! Lilly was going to be there, and I couldn't watch James sit there and stare at her all day… "It's okay. I'm meeting some people."

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "Some people? Like who?"

"You better not be meeting Andra, Kassie." My mother said, the scorn evident in her voice. "She isn't a good influence-"

"Laurie is going to be there, mom." I said tiredly. I was really sick of the same speech. "So is Lilly." I ignored the way James head went up at the name. "And…Remus."

"Remus?" James jumped in, a glare on his face as he looked at me for the first time in a week. "Why would Remus be going with you?"

"I told you I liked that boy." My dad said approvingly.

James continued to glare, and Sirius cleared his throat, giving me a warning look. "Well, if Remus is going, there isn't a reason for us not to go." He pointed out, though I saw him shoot James a look.

I mentally groaned. "Fine." I pushed back my chair. "We better go then." I walked over to the fireplace, grabbing some powder. "Diagon Ally."

I stepped out of the fireplace in Diagon Ally, Sirius and James following only a moment later. I led the way to the bookstore, where we were supposed to be meeting. Sirius and James were behind me, muttering to each other. I didn't try to hear what they were saying- I didn't think I wanted to know.

I saw Laurie and Remus looking at a book, Andra impatient beside them. As I walked up, her face lit up and she came running over to me. "Kassie! Save me! They've been looking at the same book for the last fifteen minutes! You have to help me!"

I giggled, pulling myself away from Andra. "Where is Lilly?"

"She owled me. Said she had something to do, and she would try to make it later." Andra told me, then her eyes shifted to the two boys behind me. She stiffened, her arm going around my shoulders protectively. "Sirius, James."

"Andra." Sirius said, smirking. "I had to join Kassie, I couldn't bare not seeing you!"

I smiled slightly as Andra rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Potter, Lilly's not here, so you might as well just go home."

James glared. "I don't need Lilly to just hang out with my friends."

"Sure you don't." Andra said, pulling me with her as she walked over to Remus and Laurie. "Hey you two. Look who's here!"

Both of them turned around, and Laurie smiled, practically throwing herself at me. "Kassie! How are you? How's your break going?"

"Fine." I said, aware of the two boys listening to every word I said.

Andra giggled, grabbing my arm. "Lets shop." She turned, dragging me along behind her. "I'm guessing you probably have to shop for everyone, am I right?" I heard someone behind me stifle a chuckle.

"maybe." I muttered, shooting a glare over my shoulder.

"I thought so!" Andra said triumphantly. She instantly handed me a piece of parchment.

"What's this?" I asked her, frowning as I took it from her.

"Your list!" She said proudly. "I picked out something for everyone. All you have to do is buy it!"

I looked at the list. Truthfully, she did a good job. I moved away as someone tried to look over my shoulder. "Go away, Black."

"Black?" Sirius asked, sounding hurt. "We not on speaking terms anymore?"

I rolled my eyes, but couldn't stop the small smile from coming onto my face. "Sorry, Sirius. But you cant see what I'm going to buy you- or any of your friends!" I said, seeing the look on his face/

He went back to pouting.

"Ah, poor pad foot." Remus laughed, smiling at his friend. He turned his laughing eyes on me. "I'll take them away from you for an hour, sound good?"

"Please do." I practically begged, trying not to look at James. I really didn't want him there, something I was sure was obvious. To bad I didn't care,

"Done." Remus laughed, motioning for his two friends to follow him. Sirius did so, shooting me a grin. James, on the other hand, made things even more difficult.

"I think I'll stay with you." He said, his voice quiet clear.

Everyone froze, either looking at me or James. I frowned, my heart pounding in my chest. I fought back a groan, then looked at him. His eyes were on me, telling me not to argue. Telling me I wasn't going to win this one. It was a look I had learned well over out time together.

"Fine." I snapped, turning on my heel and walking down the street.

I heard some muttering behind me, then two sets of footsteps. "Hey, doll." Andra said, throwing her arm around me once again. James fell into step with me on the other side. "Where to first?"

"I don't know." I said harshly, then instantly regretted it. "Sorry. You made the list. Where should I go?"

She looked like she was thinking about the question, but shot me an amused look. "To look for me! Come on!"

She grabbed my hand, pulling me into the first clothing store she saw. I couldn't help but laugh. "Andra! I cant afford to buy you a new wardrobe!"

She smirked. "one or two things wont break you." She informed me, acting as if she knew more about my bank account then I did- which, actually, could be true.

"Shouldn't she be getting things for everyone else, before they come back?" James asked, leaning against the wall and looking at Andra. "It makes more sense that way."

Andra glared at him. "Did I ask you?"

"No." James said, but he raised his eyebrows and frowned at her. "Though maybe you should have. Not everything is about you."

"Nor is it about you." Andra snapped, taking a step towards him.

"No." He agreed. "But its for Kassie. I bet she wants to get her shopping done."

"Don't you dare tell me what Kassie wants!" Andra hissed. "You don't get to decide anything for her anymore!"

"I didn't realize I got to in the first place."


End file.
